I look like shit.

Several years and about five thousand beers really takes a toll on you. I mean, what the fuck, look at me. I look like shit.

Hope Merchant

Strange thing these dreams. Most nights I don't think I dream but sometimes I do, and I believe that the more abstract the better and memorable. I recall various dreams were I've given birth or run from evil beings I never actually saw. In a recent dream I was being called a "Hope Merchant" which I have no idea what that could possibly mean but it involved an M-16 and loaded magazines being handed to me by my wife (odd) with townspeople cheering for the Hope Merchant (me). I have heard some people keep a diary next to there bed and in the morning they will right down a brief recount of what they dreamed. I would love to read someones dream diary. It probably reads like Timothy Leary's research notes. I've also heard that some people will designate a friend to clean out all there porn if they die so their legacy isn't fetish porn but wonderful stories of charisma. I would recommend including dream diary on the list of things to clean out if you die so they don't think you were doing psychedelic drugs before bed.

(Pictured is a photographic interpretation of dreaming)

If you need me on Black Friday, you know where I will be.

Preposterous Thought – Waking up at 4 am and bundling up to beat the cold, only to drive to an overcrowded store to fight with mobs of people trying to get the same $10 sale on a DVD Player…only to drive to another crowded store for Hannah Montana sale. Eat at chain restaurant. Go home pissed off.



Not so Preposterous Thought: Sleep until 9. Make coffee. Add whiskey to said coffee. Log onto computer. Order Christmas gift. Sit on couch in boxers until afternoon. Go to Emmett's for pale ale.

If you need me on Black Friday, you know where I will be.



-Marks Guest Post

Super China Buffet

The Chinese food buffet is the worst idea for anyone looking for a good meal. This is a photographic journey of what I call session eating.

The Red Carpet

I'm married now. I wrote my own vow, and then transcribed it to harmonica solo. There wasn't a dry eye in the house.

Fresh Hops!

The beer I wait all year for has hit the shelves. This is Goose Islands end of summer/fall seasonal beer made with fresh hops instead of pelletized hops that beer is typically made with. If you haven't tried this yet I recommend you do so. Here's mine shortly after purchase, thanks Katie for pointing out the sale, while walking through the parking lot of the local Jewel-Osco.

Shop Vac

In the last two days I've vacuumed up roughly 36 gallons of water from the basement floor. It has finally stopped raining after a relentless four day down pour.

Day 7; Creation

Working on various gifts for various people. 26 dollars, one bent sewing needle, and one migraine all in the name of friendship. Luckily Coors light is the most refreshing beer on Earth at least until the Hadron particle accelerator destroys it.

Day 6; Dan

Any other form and I wouldn't recognize him.

Day; 5 The hidden benfit of a twin.

Sometimes I see someone and their twin and think that it might very well suck to have a walking double. I have no twin but if I did I imagine the benefit of having an outside perspective of yourself, or at least someone who looks like yourself could prove invaluable. You could see for yourself if you need to lose weight, change your hairstyle, or stop wearing certain clothing styles. It may also prove be an accurate gauge of how lame some of your mannerisms are, and show first hand certain phrases you use too often that may help to consider avoiding. Having said that I also wonder if the novelty would wear off before you ever realize the benefit of utilizing the situation as a resource for introspection.

Day 4: Creative Text Messaging

Next time you want to send a text message to a close friend try this more creative and interesting form. Draw a sketch that depicts the message you're trying to convey, and send them a photo of that sketch. Here is a text sent by my brother, which served to ask me if we were going to our favorite bar, Emmett's, later that evening.

Day 3: Simple insight

Here's a little insight to ponder on this rainy afternoon.


In life there will always be someone who takes things way too seriously.

Day 2; The Origin of Blogging

If you should ever take an English composition course they will definitely teach you never to talk about the paper in the paper. Similarly you should never talk about the blog post in the blog post. You can, however, discuss blogging in a blog post. Where did blogging begin? You could say blogging grew organically out of the traditional diary or journal over time combined with technology. I have my own theory. I feel the blog as an online journal and creative outlet is a result of two key figures in American history; Doogie Howser m.d. and Jack Handey. These two people were bloggers who were way ahead of their time.
At the end of ever Doogie Howser m.d. episode he was seen writing in a journal on his computer and saving it to a now classic 3x5 floppy disc. However lame his concluding wisdom may have been it was fundamentally what blogging is. As for Jack Handey, who by the way is a real comedic author, in many Saturday Night Live episodes showed text of a "Deep Thought" scroll over a scenic photo while being narrated. This looked and sounded like genius blog posts. Two prime examples of blogging before it became a reality.
While millions of bloggers support was is known as the blogosphere and Doogie Howser dodges thousands of malpractice suits, Jack Handey is still publishing sheer genius. I relish his writing style and take comfort in knowing he never lost his identity by succumbing to his own creation. The blogosphere, written by hundreds of millions and read by no one.

Day 1; Appreciation Week Drawing.

What you may have heard is true, I'm having a drawing. Here's how it works; email me at pete@dependablepete.com to enter. I will reply to your entry with a number, that number will be written on a tiny piece of paper and put in a (empty) fish bowl, then at the end of the Fan Base Appreciation Week I'll draw the winners. Here's the prizes; one winner will receive a signed photo your favorite local celebrity, me, Dependable Pete, and the grand prize is a signed photo of Dependable Pete and you will be invited to author a post to be put up on Dependable Pete.com. Ok, so don't waste too much time in entering.

The BLT

If you want the perfect BLT logic will tell you that you need a tomato slice that is equal in diameter as your bread slice. My advice for growing a tomato for such a sandwich is that no amount of fertilizer is too much. Watch a short slide show of my perfect BLT.

Friendship

Friends. The most important people in your life. Treat them well, because you will find that the good things in life are best when shared with the ones you care about. Malt liquor is one of those good things.

Chili

 

A friend from work and I went for a nice ride on our bikes after work. We stopped for chili which turned out to be good enough, no pun intended, Cindy.

Lakefront Brewery

A regional brewery based in Milwaukee has always had the best tour, and a really good line of beers. They've certainly hit one out of the park with their newest edition to the family, this IPA. I give it an A+.

Dependable Pete Classic Clip: Stop motion beer

Bicycle

It's summer, you should get outside and go for a bike ride. I mean, look at you, all cooped up in the house and it's so nice outside.

DependablePete Classic Clip: The IPA

Here's a short clip of a very underrated custom in our culture, ordering a beer.

Poems and Pics

When the days are long,
and your stresses have compounded.
The days of your youth are gone,
And the pressure of a career have mounted.
I shall ask you to sit with me,
and I'll lend you my ear.
You are all you need to be
while you enjoy a frosty beer

I could never have seen this coming.

This is quite simply mind blowing. This photo is of a girl named Gina. She lived next door to my family all through my childhood. Her family is very religious. One day, several years ago, I'm sitting in a bar with my brother (not uncommon) and a free magazine distributed to all local bars intended to advertise drink specials and various events in the area is sitting there and I'm staring at it blankly as I drift off in space (not uncommon). Suddenly I snap out of it, scrunch my face, and mumble "wait". I open the cover to the table of contents and read what I never thought possible. If her family ever saw this they would most certainly disown her. What I felt was particularly unnecessary is going topless behind the guitar. Had she wore a shirt behind the guitar her parents would be proud of her small success and I'd have no fun with this. After my brother and I decided not to drop it in their mailbox as an effort to sabotage her, I saw her in their driveway and delicately asked her about it. The website and magazine state very clearly all modeling is done free, models aren't paid. She made up this bullshit story that they gave her a thousand dollars, laughable, but, honestly, I can't blame her because I would have said that too.

Fireside Folk

Take A quick tour of the folk songwriting room as it nears completion. Exciting things are on the horizon.

Breakfast Pic

Chorizo and eggs on Saturday morning. Too good, too spicy, and oh so filling.

Beer Brat

 

One onion, one brat, one bun, and one satisfied Dependable Pete. MMMMMmmmmm.....I spoke fluent German for a good hour after eating this. Guten Tag!

Pro Bowler.

Here's me out throwing rocks.

Crossing the line

 

Just when you thought you they couldn't take it any farther. Behold the Harley Davidson fertilizer spreader. I'm saving up for the screaming eagle billet wheels. The fertilizer is made out of ground up bikers.

Three pretty little maids all in a row.

 

This is the most beautiful picture I've ever taken in my entire life. Just look at it. I took it with my cell phone and sent it to myself in email, and when I saw later on at home I swear it brought a tear to my eye. Take a moment. Beauty, perfection, and innocence. Mug #62 is in the middle.

Sound Quality (Test Clip)

This post is intended to test several things, video quality, my cameras mic, and how it all works out loading it on the Blog. For the sake of being factual, that's my G&L Bluesboy. If you're wondering why this needs to be tested, well that will be revealed soon enough.

Living the High Life

A few years ago I toured the Miller Brewery to see how the big boys do their thing. You see sometimes we can get caught up in our microbrewery ways. Here's a clip of me delicately sampling a Miller High Life. (Turn the sound down on this one, because some douche bag college kids at another table decide to chime in with "Chug...Chug..")

Our Luncheon Together.

In a previous post I asked a simple question. Do lunch pics ever make you feel like you sitting there with me discussing philosophy while plowing fast food? This pic may help you feel that way. Here's me, Dependable Pete, destroying a beef sandwich at the famous Russell's Barbecue while looking you right in the eye.

It's Another Dependable Pete Classic Clip

Turn the sound on and I think you'll like it.

Lunch pic on a rescheduled afternoon

 

Damn it feels good to be a gangster.

Welcome to the Carribean.

In response to the inappropriate comments made regarding the arrest photo from my trip to the dragon (Deals Gap), here's a photo taken during my career in logistics (smuggling). The officers hats seem out of place, wouldn't you agree?

Sold Out.

After a lengthy and equally heated conference call between my manager, agent, and myself, my name has been legally changed to "U.S. Cellular Presents Dependable Pete". So, per my new contract, if you don't mind, thats what I'd like to be referred to as until further notice. Sometimes we do things outside of what we normally would to further our careers as local celebrities especially when a writers guild strike ends and my contract is up.

(Thats me on stage)

Lunar Eclipse

Last night I watched as the moon (Luna) was eclipsed by the great almighty Earth. The Sun in all its glory passed behind Earth casting one hell of a shadow upon the face of our beloved moon. I can't help but wonder what it might be like to stand on the surface of the moon. What would I do there, I ask myself? The only thing I was sure of was to simply look back at earth. Why is it that astronauts in there wisdom spend all that time and energy working toward space travel only to reach the farthest place ever before, jam a flag in the sand, and look back at home. Seems silly to me. Go to the moon just to look at earth in the same fashion. Life. Grow old just to recollect on your younger days. Discontent seems to be something of a problem affecting all of us. Me, I look forward, soon I (lady friend included) will be a homeowner.

Candy Cane

Since I've figured out the feature that allows me to post video clips I've received overwhelming demand to post this classic clip. This is me and my brother putting a candy cane in a cordless drill. Enjoy.

DependablePete Classic Clip: The Pocket Bike.

This is what my work days look like.

Rock N Roll

Dependable Pete is in the Combat Zone. (Promo pic for Brutally Handsome)

Danger!

There's a lot of jobs out there with an inherent level of danger. Some of these jobs are obvious like; logging, and tug boat captaining, but an incredible amount of others go unrecognized. Imagining some possibilities you can't help but realize the people doing these jobs will inevitably become desensitized to the danger in these situations. It's especially funny when you envision the dialogs between the workman getting home and his wife asking how his day went. Here's an example I think puts my point a little bit more in focus, the job title would be, Department of Corrections Bus Driver. I have to assume this guy gets punched in the face on a daily basis by the obvious felons regardless of any fence he may sit behind. There's the background, now lets get to the experiment. Dude gets home from work and his wife asks innocently "How was work Honey"? Dude casually replies "I was held hostage for like two hours until Officer Coharsky stepped in and shot the guy, and then we got lunch at Wendy's. It was OK, I got a #2".
Here's another. Indoor Shooting Range Attendant, I'm guessing the close-calls can get a little nuts. Dude gets home from work and his wife poses the same question. Dudes answer "Some idiot with a .45 almost smoked me so I kicked him out. Oh and the Ham sandwich was good. Is that new mustard"?
Think of your own examples, it's kind of funny to imagine.

Quilt

This is a quilt I made for Nick, Katies brother, as a Christmas gift.

Fur Real

Can you believe this. This is a real-live-no bullshit Cat, and its bigger than the golden retriever currently living at my parents house.

MLK

Today I had lunch with my future brother-in-law. In celebration of our diversity, we went to Portillos. In speaking with several people I posed a simple question; "Is Martin Luther King day the anniversary of his birth or death"? The first answer was usually birth, it was however, strikingly easy to convince otherwise as most Americans are relatively uncertain of our history. Which would then pose the obvious question, why the hell would anyone celebrate an assassination? Here's a photo of Nick destroying a jumbo dog with everything on it (sorry it's blurry, try squinting when you look at it).

Lunch Pic!

Guess what? I had lunch today. I went to this Italian joint called Nana's Cuccina. It's like a really good Italian food and bakery kinda place. I had a most delicious meatball sub and coke, and to my surprise the lid to my cup had no hole in it for my straw, see, I took a photo of that too. What a great lunch on what will be one of the last Fridays I'll have off in a long time due to a pending schedule change next week.